Herongraystairs: The Best Dynamic in The Shadowhunter Chronicles

It’s no secret that I adore The Shadowhunter Chronicles. I have reviewed plenty of Shadowhunter novels on my blog, and I constantly gush about these characters on my social media accounts. In my Ghosts of the Shadow Market book review, I mentioned that I believe Will Herondale, Tessa Gray, and Jem Carstairs (also known as Herongraystairs) have the best dynamic in the books. Well, I finally decided to sit down and explain why. So, here’s my article dedicated to Herongraystairs—the best dynamic in The Shadowhunter Chronicles! (Featuring canon quotes to back up everything I say.)

Will, Tessa, and Jem first appear in The Infernal Devices, and they continue to appear in other Shadowhunter narratives. However, their story originates in this trilogy—one of the most epic (love) stories of all time. They literally transcend time and space, as we have seen in other Shadowhunter books. These three invented the found family trope, and no one embodies it better than they do.

Will and Jem meet first, but this takes place before the books. Jem arrives at the London Institute in 1873, already dying from yin fen, and suffering the sudden loss of his parents, murdered at the hands of the demon Yanluo. And by the time Jem arrived at the Institute, Will also had his fair share of suffering. He believed a demon cursed him, unable to be around anyone he loves because they will die. However, Will allowed himself to get close to Jem and become his parabatai because Jem was already dying. Will and Jem were barely teenagers, and already, they had suffered so much.

Then, Tessa came to London in 1878 and changed these boys forever. She fell in love with both of them, and they fell in love with her. Initially, Tessa felt broken because she had feelings for Will and Jem, but she eventually realized that she could love them both. Loving Will and Jem at the same time did not diminish her love for them or their love for her. Essentially, Herongraystairs is the equivalent of a vee poly relationship, even though they did not play out like that.

Regardless of the circumstances, one thing is clear: Will, Tessa, and Jem love each other wholly and unconditionally, far beyond any obstacle that separates them (Silent Brotherhood, death, societal norms, etc.)

How they loved each other, these three, how they had suffered for each another, and yet how much joy they clearly took from simply being in the same room.

Herongraystairs mimics a vee relationship more than a triad, but I find that most readers do not view them this way. They see the trio as a friendship and prefer Tessa & Jem or Tessa & Will. They might even prefer Tessa & Will during The Infernal Devices and Tessa & Jem after The Mortal Instruments. Either way, it saddens me that people see Herongraystairs as a love triangle. If their story were in the present day, they would be a vee relationship. But this is London 1878, so ideally, it had to be a love triangle. Does that stop Tessa from loving Will and Jem equally and vice versa? Absolutely not. It creates a lot of angst at first, especially since Jem is dying, and a billion other things are happening simultaneously. However, when the drama ends, Tessa realizes she can love Will and Jem equally, and they can love her at the same time.

Regardless, a love triangle implies two people have feelings for the same third person, and the third person will sort out their feelings and realize they love only one of them in the end. Tessa was supposed to end up with Jem until he was on his deathbed and became a Silent Brother. She did not marry Will as a backup option—she loved both of them, but she was initially engaged to Jem. And Tessa did not say yes to Jem’s proposal because she could not have Will. Tessa said yes to both of them under different circumstances because she loves both of them equally at the end of the day. She would never choose one over the other.

Furthermore, Will and Jem’s love for Tessa made their bond stronger; it did not drive them further apart. Their bond grew strong on its own, which brings me to my next point—how can Will and Jem participate in a triad relationship if they are parabatai?

Before we move on, I would just like to reiterate that regardless of how you view Herongraystairs, they cannot be a love triangle by societal standards. By definition, they are a love triangle, but because of how this trope plays out in fiction, we cannot refer to Herongraystairs as one. According to Wikipedia (terrible source, but in this case, they carry an accurate definition), a love triangle “can refer to a polyamorous relationship between three people, [but] it usually refers to two people who compete against each other for the undivided romantic attention of a single interest.” Will and Jem never view each other as rivals competing for Tessa’s attention, and Cassie never portrayed them that way.

Therefore, the only obvious solution in Herongraystairs’s situation is that they are not a conventional love triangle. They are the former half of the definition I provided, or they are a love circle because Will, Tessa, and Jem just really love each other at the end of the day.

“They say you cannot love two people equally at once,” she said. “And perhaps for others that is so. But you and Will—you are not like two ordinary people, two people who might have been jealous of each other, or who would have imagined my love for one of them diminished by my love of the other. You merged your souls when you were both children. I could not have loved Will so much if I had not loved you as well. And I could not love you as I do if I had not loved Will as I did.”

Even though Herongraystairs is more akin to a vee relationship, I think they would work best as a triad. However, a triad presents the parabatai issue since it is forbidden for parabatai to be romantically involved. But did that stop Emma and Julian? Nope. Jem even compared his bond with Will to Emma and Julian several times. Sure, Jem did not know that Emma and Julian harbored romantic feelings for each other, but he is a perceptive man. When he discovered the truth, he did not feel awkward about making the comparison. Jem was genuinely happy for Emma and Julian, and I personally interpreted it as a wistful type of happiness—maybe things would have been different if he, Tessa, and Will grew up in 2012 instead of the 1870s.

It may seem like I am grasping at straws, but I don’t think I am. Think about other parabatai pairings—they are nothing like Will and Jem. We will not include Alec and Jace or Livvy and Ty because that would be incest. Yes, I know Livvy and Ty never actually became parabatai, but Ty finally agreed shortly before the unspeakable happened. But we have Clary and Simon. Matthew and James. Cordelia and Lucie (who are not parabatai yet, but they will be soon). Julie and Beatriz, whose friendship we got a glimpse of in Tales of the Shadowhunter Academy.

The reality is, Will and Jem are nothing like these pairings. Cassie even said that they have an “intense romantic friendship.” Could someone please tell me how we can interpret this phrase without thinking Will and Jem had feelings for Tessa and each other? Yes, writers often portrayed male friendships in the Victorian Era under these guidelines. But I studied male relationships in Victorian literature. I read many books and critiques on the subject (here’s my personal favorite!). There is still a difference between the romantic friendships Cassie talks about and purely platonic friendships. But she is right when she says they cannot count as LGBTQ+ representation since it was not canon in the books! And honestly, if they were romantically canon in the books as they stand, I think it would have vastly diminished the platonic and familial love they have for each other.

Even if Will and Jem were explicitly bisexual in the novels, I think many readers would have forgotten Tessa (mainly because of how straight cis girls fetishize gay relationships). And Tessa plays a crucial role in Will and Jem’s feelings. She is their anchor. Could Will and Jem stand on their own as a romance, the way Will & Tessa and Jem & Tessa do? Probably, but I’m not sure if Will and Jem would realize their romantic feelings for each other without Tessa. Tessa brought them closer together; she did not drive them further apart. Whether you see Herongraystairs as a vee relationship or a triad, she is still the anchor that allows Will and Jem to see each other in a new light. Besides, Will and Jem’s potential romance would not be as powerful without Tessa—the same way that Will & Tessa and Jem & Tessa are not as powerful when there are only two of them, and not three. The romances within this trio are just not as strong if all three of them are not together.

However, Herongraystairs works as a triad because there is something between Will and Jem. Everyone is entitled to their own interpretations, but think about it: Jem was supposed to die. He was not supposed to become a Silent Brother; he was unable to. So, how does the impossible happen? How did Jem survive the transition into Silent Brotherhood? Jem eventually got rid of the yin fen in his body, which could not have occurred without becoming Brother Zachariah. But Jem was not supposed to live to see heavenly fire in Shadowhunter hands, making Jem’s time as Brother Zachariah symbolic. Heavenly fire is the power that runs through angel veins. How does such a powerful substance come into play? I’ll give you some hints.

When Julian suffered a fatal wound from the crossbow bolt. He was dying; then, Emma saved him through their parabatai bond.

When Jem touched Jace after heavenly fire consumes his veins. This heavenly fire did not affect anyone else, but it transformed Brother Zachariah back into Jem Carstairs.

When Jem was supposed to die from the yin fen all those years ago, but he became a Silent Brother instead. It should have been impossible, but something had kept Jem alive all this time. From the moment he became a Silent Brother until the heavenly fire freed him from the yin fen and his Brotherhood.

And that something is his love for Tessa and Will. He never differentiated between the two people he loved. Jem never explicitly stated that he was in love with Tessa, but he loved Will as a parabatai. Jem loved them both equally, in the same manner, making Will, Tessa, and Jem a triad rather than a vee relationship.

I will leave you with this quote from Cassie herself: “Do I think Heronstairs makes total sense within the framework of the narrative of Infernal Devices? Yes, it does. Nothing contradicts it.“

And this other quote from After the Bridge:

“I’ve never seen anyone so in love, except for …”

[skip to the end]

“What you said before,” she asked. “That Jace Herondale loves Clarissa Fairchild more than anyone you’ve ever known except someone — you never finished the sentence. Who was it?” “I was going to say you and me and Will,” he said. “But — that’s rather a strange thing to say, isn’t it?” “Not strange at all.” She cuddled in close against his side. “Exactly right. Ever and always, exactly right.”

Now that we have covered the bases, I will explain, in-depth, why Herongraystairs is superior to the other romances in The Shadowhunter Chronicles. Their love transcends time and space. Tessa loves Will decades after his death; she loves Jem even when they cannot be together. Even in Thule, she loved Will and Jem, hence transcending space. That epilogue in The Infernal Devices? It is only a few pages, but those few pages are powerful. We feel Tessa’s unconditional love for these two boys. There is a reason The Infernal Devices is usually everyone’s favorite series, and I firmly believe it has to do with Herongraystairs. Their relationship makes up the trilogy’s entirety; The Infernal Devices would have been a far weaker series if it weren’t for their powerful dynamic.

Since Herongraystairs transcends time, space, and rules, they are automatically more epic than any other romance. Sure, Cassie painted Clary and Jace as the strongest love since Herongraystairs, but they don’t beat them. Simon and Isabelle are pretty powerful in their own way since Simon lost his memories and fell in love with Isabelle all over again anyway. Emma and Julian survived being True Nephilim and broke their parabatai curse. Magnus and Alec changed Shadowhunter-Downworlder relations, including sacred wedding ceremonies. James’s love for Cordelia was so powerful that it broke a cursed bracelet made by a literal Prince of Hell. But have any of these couples survived the testament of time, including world wars, death, Silent Brotherhood, physical barriers, and emotional barriers? Have they endured the unbearable pain that Will, Tessa, and Jem have and come out stronger than ever? Does their love bleed through the pages of Shadowhunter novels? Is there an epic romance that has lasted longer than they have? Nope. Herongraystairs wins every single time.

Herongraystairs is also the superior polyamorous relationship—looking at you, Kierarktina. I was particularly bitter about Kierarktina being the first official poly relationship in The Shadowhunter Chronicles because I hated Kieran. He is an abuser who never apologized for his actions. It broke my heart that the narrative recognized Kierarktina as a polyamorous relationship before Kieran redeemed himself (which was the bare minimum). Will, Tessa, and Jem have a love that is so much more powerful, defeating all the odds. When Kierarktina has even a fraction of what Herongraystairs does, we can reevaluate the superior polyamorous relationship. Just kidding, it will always be Herongraystairs. But Kierarktina could have had a far better chance if Kieran actually redeemed himself before the relationship bloomed.

How could three people who cared for one another so much cause one another so much pain?

For the most part, Will, Tessa, and Jem’s actual relationship is often considered a friendship. They love each other in different ways on different levels, but it comes down to a friendship when it is just the three of them. Besides, they all started as friends; Will and Jem were even parabatai. So, let’s look at Herongraystairs as a friendship. There are plenty of platonic dynamics to compare them to: Clary & Simon, The Merry Thieves, Magnus & Ragnor & Catarina, and more. Some of these friendships have existed longer than Herongraystairs, that is true. However, Cassandra Clare wrote an entire anthology dedicated to Herongraystairs (Ghosts of the Shadow Market). Brother Zachariah struggled with his humanity but never lost it because the two people he loved most guided him home: Will and Tessa.

Will, Tessa, and Jem have been through hell and back together, but their love endured it all. Even now, in the present day—when Will has been dead for over seventy years, Jem is no longer a Shadowhunter, and Tessa created a life of her own—their love is as strong as ever. It is everlasting; it is radiant; it is beautiful in every form and shines brighter than any other dynamic. I apologize for sounding super cheesy, but Herongraystairs deserves all the love and cheesiness in the world. And at the end of the day, no matter what happens romantically, they are, first and foremost, a friendship.

If she lived until the sun died, there would never be any other for her besides Will and Jem, those two twin souls, the only souls she had ever loved.

Herongraystairs as a family is my personal favorite Herongraystairs. Why? Because familial love is unconditional, and Herongraystairs has always been that. They have always been a family with pure, unconditional love. They are the definition of the found family trope; they made their own family. Tessa had kids with both Will and Jem, but we can assume that James, Lucie, Mina, and Kit grow up together as one family in some beautiful alternate universe. Wow, I wish I was there right now.

If we consider other Shadowhunter families, Herongraystairs still comes out on top. My favorite Shadowhunter family line is the Lightwoods, but if we’re talking about actual dynamics, Herongraystairs wins. Even though Will, Lucie, and James have been dead for a long time, they are still a part of Tessa, Jem, Mina, and Kit’s family. Tessa and Jem’s family never felt complete without a Herondale. Can any other Shadowhunter family say they deeply cherish family members from over one hundred years ago, long after their deaths? Doubtful.

Herongraystairs blended three Shadowhunter families: the Herondales, the Carstairs, and the Starkweathers. The Starkweathers may not be iconic, but Tessa certainly is. The Herondales? An iconic family. The Carstairs? Also, an iconic family. But the most iconic family? That’s right, Herongraystairs, or alternatively, the Herondale Carstairs, since Tessa goes by Herondale Carstairs.

Furthermore, Herongraystairs descendants encompass the Blackthorns and the Lightwoods, even if the latter is through adoption. That is five Shadowhunter families, four of which remain iconic, even though the Lightwoods had a blip with Robert’s generation. There is no other Shadowhunter line that can account for this many families. Will, Tessa, and Jem created a dynasty—you cannot get more iconic than that.

And if that did not convince you, just picture Will, Tessa, and Jem living together at Cirenworth, raising their children together—James, Lucie, Mina, and Kit. It is the purest and sweetest image, full of unconditional love, family, and friendship. I associate this image with peace and serenity because if the universe gave Will, Tessa, and Jem a chance, they would have the most wholesome, loving family produced from their wholesome, loving relationship.

If it had been anyone else, anyone else in the world—but she did not love anyone else in the world. These were the boys she loved. For better. And for worse.

Whew, that was quite the article! But thank you for sticking with me until the end. Now that I am temporarily ceding from voicing my opinion on Herongraystairs, I want to hear from you guys! Do you have a favorite relationship in The Shadowhunter Chronicles? It can be romantic, platonic, parabatai, or familial—whatever your heart desires! If you haven’t read any Shadowhunter books, tell me about your favorite relationship in any other series or standalone you love. I can’t wait to see what you guys have to say. Relationships, in general, are one of the most important aspects for me when reading any story. A novel can have the most compelling plot with complex characters, but if those characters cannot form meaningful relationships, it would be hard for me to give that book a high rating.

If you missed my March 2021 Wrap-Up, you could check it out here. My latest book reviews include Sweet & Bitter Magic by Adrienne Tooley and my review of Chain of Iron by Cassandra Clare (and of course, in the latter, I talk more about Herongraystairs). You can also check out my latest TV Fanatic articles!